If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
my shit smells like andre
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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