The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Randomize
