I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
God, I missed his penis.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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