i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
