We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I have aggressive nipples.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize