U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
