just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize