Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize