Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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