Umm I'm too high to move.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
