I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
