Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Randomize
