I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
It's shark week go big or go home
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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