Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize