At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
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