If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I can't trust your balls anymore.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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