His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
