Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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