I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
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