I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
