I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
