Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
