YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
