no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
