I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
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Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
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we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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