so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
