Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
