A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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