Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
