Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize