So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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