I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
