she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
These tits shall not be calmed
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
