well most of my day revolves around power hour
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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