no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize