We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
We got so high we made milksteak
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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