GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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