That's intense
Please, let me fuck your mom
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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