I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
