Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
