my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
