I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I think my fart just growled at me.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
