That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize