You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
True strength comes from lack of pants
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
