Are we in a gay sports bar?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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