Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
