I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We don't watch enough power rangers
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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