I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
