before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize