I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize