I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
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next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
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I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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