No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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