He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Randomize